Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Back By Popular Demand -- JK

Sorry folks, been a bit busy. You'd be amazed at how much I can get accomplished when not in front of a computer. No stalkerbook, Spirit, WWTDD, NAFOOM and shit I can do some wonders on work.

So lets start out by professing my extreme hate for the Memphis Tiger. I mean, as I type this I can feel myself getting stressed out. They aggrivate the hell out of me. Mainly because you have people that grew up in Memphis, went to Ole Miss, State, Auburn (Fill in with your school choice) yet still manage to be die hard Tiger High Fans. How the hell does that happen? Your alligance to your school is like marriage friends, til death do us part. I mean, I am a Rebel through and through. I might have teams that I am kinda like ya, hope they win against XYZ team, but I could give two shits if they win or lose. Those teams PS, my "bandwagon or other" teams are USC, UGA and Colorado. Random. Yes. But again, I could careless if they win or lose to be honest, but I will cheer for them if they are on the tube. But for the Memphis wanna be fans, why don't you go buy some white tennis shoes, some hair gel, go pierce your lip and drive your sooped up HUN-da. Just infuriates me. I think I hate them more than LSU. The fuel is added to my fire when I pick up the paper everymorning to find out that on the front page, they tell me that John Calapari took a dump on a yellow shitter. Then the next day he walked on beige carpet. I mean who the hell cares. Talk about the freaking Grizzlies, talk about the REBELS. I would rather read about MSU. You don't see me cheering on the mighty cougars of Houston, or the mean Owls of Rice do you. Hell I don't even cheer for the Texas Longhorns, unlike most people at Ole Miss who are from Texas but couldn't get in so came to Ole Miss. They would rather go to a UT game then an Ole Miss game, and that kinda crap drives me up the wall. If/when I move back to Houston, I will be the most obnoxious Ole Miss fan there, and I will go to HS to promote Ole Miss. I went to the Notre Dame Tennessee Game and the Notre Dame Michigan game and wore Ole Miss Polos to both games. Ya, well if I could marry Ole Miss, I would. Shes fine. And has a ton of property in God's Country. I love Ole Miss. You should love your University. Not someone elses you clowns.

Memphis fans...remind me of......


While we are on the topic of Memphis. Here is a great blog for any Memphians....
http://www.paulryburn.com/blog/
Especially if you live downtown. Mo tight.

So the rebels finalized their 2009 & 2010 schedule for football. its booboo. Aside from our nasty home games, we have terrible non confrence games. Slap Pete Boone if you see him for me.

OLE MISS 2009 FOOTBALL SCHEDULE


DATE
OPPONENT
LOCATION
Sept. 5 Memphis
Memphis, Tenn.
Sept. 12 Open
Sept. 19
Southeastern Louisiana
Oxford
Sept. 24
South Carolina (ESPN)
Columbia, S.C.
Oct. 3
Vanderbilt
Nashville, Tenn.
Oct. 10
Alabama
Oxford
Oct. 17
UAB (HC)
Oxford
Oct. 24
Arkansas
Oxford
Oct. 31
Auburn
Auburn, Ala.
Nov. 7
Northern Arizona
Oxford

Nov. 14
Tennessee
Oxford
Nov. 21
LSU
Oxford
Nov. 28
Mississippi State
Starkville, Miss.



OLE MISS 2010 FOOTBALL SCHEDULE


DATE
OPPONENT
LOCATION
Sept. 4
Jacksonville State
Oxford
Sept. 11
Tulane
New Orleans, La.
Sept. 18
Vanderbilt
Oxford
Sept. 25
Fresno State
Oxford
Oct. 2
Kentucky
Oxford
Oct. 9
Open


Oct. 16
Alabama
Tuscaloosa, Ala.
Oct. 23
Arkansas
Fayetteville, Ark.
Oct. 30
Auburn
Oxford
Nov. 6
Louisiana-Lafayette
Oxford
Nov. 13
Tennessee
Knoxville, Tenn.
Nov. 20
LSU
Baton Rouge, La.
Nov. 27
Mississippi State
Oxford




Ole Miss future non-conference games scheduled:

2011


Sept. 3
Southern Illinois
Oxford
Oct. 1
Fresno State
Fresno, Calif.




2012


Sept. 1
Central Arkansas
Oxford
Sept. 8
UAB
Birmingham, Ala.
Sept. 15
Texas
Oxford

Sept. 22
Tulane
Oxford





2013


Sept. 14
Texas Austin, Texas




2015


TBA
Clemson
Clemson, S.C.

TBA
Fresno State
Oxford





2016


TBA
Clemson
Oxford

TBA
Tulane
New Orleans, La.




2017


TBA
Tulane
Oxford





2019


TBA
Georgia Tech
Oxford





2020


TBA
Georgia Tech
Atlanta, Ga.


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Hope that comes out ok and formatted ok on the blog, if not o well, call geek squad for me and have them figure it out for me.

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Rebs one last night vs Arky St and wore green hats because of our good friend Asst. Marketing Director Brandon Hudspeth, props to him for setting it up, all ass slaps and high fives should be forwarded to his facebook wall.

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So Ian had a shit show this weekend. Ole Scotty boy from B-Ham (College Roomie) came to visit me. Henry (current roomie) had like 8 of his boys come in. We hit up the crawfish boil at Red Rooster, then went to the dog track in West Memphis. I won $40 off a $2 bet, I was pumped! Then dominated Raifords. Where I drank 2 32oz beers. Listen, thats impressive ok. If you have to drink a whole one at raifords, clearly the earlier part of your night did not go as planned.

Saturday, well we played bar golf. Our rules were as followed.
visit 9 bars. 30 minuets at each bar.

Beer = 1 point
Mixed Drink = 2 points
Shot =3 points
Silkies Diver= 10 points
Puke time= -10 points
Bathroom Breaks = -5 *allowed one per hour at no charge.

Well, I won that joker, I was the last man standing, therefore I win. We hit up Silly Goose, Club 152, Club Chill, some rando bar on Beale, Silkys, Raifords. Well we were supposed to hit 9 but we stayed at Silkys for a long time. Then I stayed at raifords forever. Until the joker closed. At 4:30am. I freaking dominated the drumb set like a jackass both nights at raiford too. I have never played the drums. I sounded like this probably.


So Saturday at Raifords. Me and this unknown lady were grinding......to this.....


Which I think is a staple song there. Anyway, grinding away, I dropped it like it was hot a couple of times also. She was throwing me around and being rough with me, I was totally diggin it. I kept pulling her necklace and things appeared to be getting pretty. darned. serious on the dance floor. Well, it got less and less crowded. And all of a sudden, BOOM lights turned on and bouncers began kickin folks out. We sat on the couch, discussed a future meeting and the bouncers made us get up and leave. Her friends got in a cab, we stood out talking. I was getting her number and my freaking phone was dead. I looked at her with my lost eyes, "shit, my phones dead......uhhhhh" meanwhile her friends are in the cab screaming for her to get in, the 1 dude that was with them was standing by the door with one are proping it open (I could sense the feeling of, come on dude, are you gonna seal the deal or what make up your effin mind) So I said, well we can do this the old fashioned way ( somewhat slurred speech I imagine) do you have a pen, she looked in her purse. NO DICE. We asked in the cab. No DICE. Cabbie. NO DICE. Looked around and said "does anyone have a pen?" NO DICE. She was quickly shoveled into the cab by the dude friend who had enough waiting. No Phone Number. Ian, Fail. Well Ian also didn't have any cash. Phone was dead, and friends were gone. So began the 1st annual Raifords 5k. It was 4:30am. I began my journey down Main St. I was in jeans, a button down and loafers. Perfect attire for a 5k. I started getting winded by the Orpheum. Sad, I know. Even though I have been doing spin, but I was a little boozed up so shut it. I was approached by a Bum who asked for money, I said to him "well if I had any don't you think I'd be taking a cab?" and ran past him. Streets where empty. The rest of the way I didn't pass anyone or anything. Until I hit the round about on Mud Island. Where those familiar know that on Sunday Mornings in front of TUGS they set up a paper stand. Well the damn paper boy was just sitting in his chair to start selling the Sunday Paper. I laughed. And I am confident he was like, what the hell is going on. Folks, I was drenched in sweat when I got home. The Raifords 5K was certainly an experience, not that bad either, plus I burned all the calories I took in. I wasnt even mad. Amazing.

1 comment:

Unknown said...

"I kept pulling her necklace and things appeared to be getting pretty. darned. serious on the dance floor."

^as in 'seriously, i'm not hooking up with you'

HEYO! But seriously, you gotta close that one